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Saturday, 30 April 2005
Gold Leafing a Hard-On
Now Playing: "Sister Christian" by Night Ranger
The more I pay attention to this week's Big Media celebritoid, Jennifer Wilbanks, the more it pisses me off.

This very stupid and narcissistic little girl, who was to be married ---this very day--- for apparently the first time at the age of 32, ran away from home in Georgia last Tuesday night and fled across the country to New Mexico ---all because she was freaking out over her wedding. Along the way, she managed to plunge her entire family into a deep and grievous shock, subject her fiance to suspicions of murder, lie to the authorities, and involve them in a huge waste of resources and manpower.

Well, you know what, you very stupid and narcissistic little girl? You must have come fully pre-freaked to your present situation if you thought that 14 pairs of wedding attendants and 600 sent invitations is in any way appropriate to your station in life or to the very concept of common sense. What the fuck? Are you some sort of princess? I mean in the real world where the rest of us live ---and not in the depths of your bridal magazine and fairy tale-fueled psychosis. You were planning on more groomsmen than the Pope had pallbearers, you ridiculous liar.

Why didn't Jennifer Wilbanks have a friend or relative with the stones to stand up to her and tell her she was insane? The only thing that turns my ire to mirth in this is the thought that these same people probably lost a lot money on deposits and fees and deliveries for this absurd rooftop jack-off of a wedding.

This very stupid and narcissistic little girl deserves to be prosecuted nine ways to Sunday. And, at the very least, she can apologize to the law enforcement community for being a liar.


Posted by Toby Petzold at 8:03 PM CDT | Post Comment | View Comments (4) | Permalink
Updated: Saturday, 30 April 2005 9:11 PM CDT

Sunday, 1 May 2005 - 9:40 AM CDT

Name: Kathy K
Home Page: http://3rdhand@site-essential.com

Five'll getcha ten that it was her mother, not her, that insisted on a wedding like that.

Sunday, 1 May 2005 - 12:23 PM CDT

Name: Toby Petzold

You may be right, Kathy, but I've never been one to let the facts I don't know get in the way of an opinion I just have to share. Thanks for dropping by!

Tuesday, 10 May 2005 - 6:03 PM CDT

Name: Seph
Home Page: http://none

Wow. You've got no idea what you're talking about, you're aware of it, you admit it, and you keep talking anyway.

You're sort of like Rush Limbaugh with an enhanced sense of self-awareness. That's a start, I guess, but why not take the time to find out what you're talking about?

"I voted for this City Councilwoman cuz she's hot..." Congratulations, you are what is Wrong With America. Seeing as you have the good sense to be aware of it, maybe you'll see fit to stop celebrating your ignorance and do something about it?

Tuesday, 10 May 2005 - 8:53 PM CDT

Name: Toby Petzold

Oh, okay. You're defending this woman's behavior? What a winner! Are you also a self-absorbed shoplifting freak-job? Congratulations.

As for the run-off, I'll probably flip a coin. Both of those women are delicious.

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