Election Day Coverage
Be sure to visit the folks at Friends of Democracy sometime today and for the next several days to get information on the elections in Iraq.
They say they're even going to be broadcasting a couple hours' worth of stuff on C-SPAN tomorrow (Sunday) from 1 PM to 3 PM Central Time.
Share in this, my fellow citizens. We have lost many good young men and women for this moment.
An Essential Story on the Associated Press Mood: special
The guys at the Power Line are as indispensible to my understanding of current events as any other source ---and this post is a perfect example of that. John Hinderaker writes:
On the eve of the election in Iraq, the Associated Press went around the world, looking for people who didn't think anything good would come of the democratic process there. The AP's article, datelined Paris, is titled "Skeptics Question Worth of Iraq Election." It begins [in boldface, as I am too ignorant to format it as I would wish]:
Is an election guarded by U.S. forces and marked by assassinations and car bombs better than no election at all?
As Iraqis living abroad started casting ballots Friday, that is a divisive question, with skeptics dismissive of U.S. arguments the election could plant the seeds of democracy for the Middle East or be free and fair with American soldiers standing guard.
But who exactly are these "skeptics?" The AP quotes a handful of individuals and a couple of newspapers--not exactly a meaningful sample of world opinion. Let's take the AP's "skeptics" one at a time.
You simply have to read on from here. It is literally incredible that there should be such dishonest horseshit in the so-called Mainstream Media, but what can surprise us anymore?
What would you suppose a member of Hezbollah would have to say about the legitimacy of Western-style democracy? Just read this.
Disturbance at Fuddruckers
I just got back a while ago from having lunch at Fuddruckers with my little brother, his girlfriend, and a friend of theirs (named Rodan ---if that's to be believed). I didn't want to go there, but getting to have lunch with this particular brother is rare enough, so I went along.
I don't know if Fuddruckers is nationwide ---but you almost certainly have one of these kinds of restaurants in your area. A highly-corporatized eating experience: overly-stylized, hyper-chromatic, manufactured [fun]. It's about as human a place to graze as an Orange Julius dispensery in a shopping mall food court. Maybe the Elvis memorabilia and the other pop cultural kitsch is enough to distract you from the exorbitant prices, but not me.
Of course, when I go to place my order, I make the mistake of telling the guy behind the counter that I had never been there before. This is his cue to get on the PA system to loudly announce that "WE HAVE A FIRST-TIME CUSTOMER!!!" Bells go off and all sorts of shit happens. Jesus Christ! I'm trying to tamp this thing down like Fielding Mellish regretting his purchase of a copy of Orgasm.
All I was actually trying to do was verify that I wasn't about to mistakenly order something that was going to cost me my left nut. But what comes next? Why, this big black guy comes and tries to dance with me. You know: the First-Time Customer Dance. Ah, yes. You have to love the [spontaneity] of it all.
So I go and sit down with the pager they've given me that signals when my burger is ready. Is that really necessary? Can't they just come and find me and have some fucking dignity about it?
Anyway, places like that give me the creeps. I genuinely feel sorry for people who must work at such jobs. I realize that restaurants like Fuddruckers exist because the design works and cracker-assed suburbanites eat that stuff up, but it's still a weird experience to want. Having you ring an old firehouse bell on your way out to tell the staff how much you enjoyed it? And having them give you a hearty shout-out in return? Yecchhh.
Geographical Bachelor Mood: a-ok Now Playing: "Gear" by Naked Raygun
My friend ---an old duck hunter--- was telling me a term they use in the Army to describe a guy whose family lives far from the post where he is stationed: Geographical Bachelor.
Heh, heh. Was there ever a term more in need of belonging to a really grungy garage band?
"Fascionists"
Lots of people are criticizing Vice President Cheney for his apparel worn at yesterday's anniversary memorial at Auschwitz. Apparently, his green parka was inappropriate in a sea of black.
That may be ---for some. But considering that it was snowing and windy and well below freezing, these "fascionists" may forgive a man in his 60s ---who's suffered multiple heart attacks--- for wearing something to better keep him warm. Cheney is almost certainly on a regimen of medications that keep his blood thin ---and thoughtless pricks who may have forgotten that small fact should now remember it. That parka may have been all that was available to him under unknowable circumstances.
Our Vice President was present and showed his respect for all the world to see. What a small mind it takes to find anything far from that to be worth noting or criticizing.
A Feigning Spell
Tonight's entertainment? Reading all of these Democrats proclaim their indifference to the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences' decision to not award Fahrenheit 9/11 a single nomination in any category.
Why are these people so ungrateful to the spiritual leader of their party? Why aren't they up in arms at this politically motivated snub?
Some say that they don't care about awards or Hollywood or any of that stuff, but that's a lie. They depend on the Celebrity Left to publicize their agenda. These Leftists were all quite pleased at the mainstream acceptance of the traitor Michael Moore's 2003 award for Best Documentary. Remember that? That was validation. So what do they call this rejection now? "Uh, nothing. It doesn't matter." Right.
The Oscar is the most coveted and culturally significant cinematic achievement in all of filmmaking. The Oscars are also the most politically charged awards in all of pop culture. Remember Brando sending that Indian woman to decline his Oscar for The Godfather? Remember the self-righteous turds sitting on their hands when Elia Kazan was given a Lifetime Achievement Award? Rightly or wrongly, the Oscars matter because they belong to a very long tradition.
Thus, by snubbing Fahrenheit 9/11, the Academy was saying something. The liberal elite among them are saying that their ingratitude to their intellectual and spiritual leader is unimportant in the long run and that what really matters is sales.
The Moore-ons are pretending not to notice. Maybe they're disappointed that they hitched their wagon to a traitor's star. Maybe they're just being proud.
Phoney Baloney Now Playing:SPLART! Hooo-AAGGGHHHH!!! Glarggghhhh!!!
I'm listening to Texas Governor Rick Perry's "State of the State" address right now ---and it's making me nauseous. He's got to be the phoniest orator I have ever listened to. That's no joke, either. He's awful.
Heard Mentality Now Playing: groans from the audience
Google is said to be getting into the business of making television content searchable for both words and images. It's a very interesting idea, but Google would be using the text for programs as provided by closed captioning services. Have you ever read along with these weird outbursts of homophonic mistransliteration? They are enormously amusing.
Almost as amusing as Google's instant translations of foreign language documents. Those are hysterical.
Appeal Denied
Via The Drudge Report comes the news that Michael Moore, who is a traitor, did not receive a single Academy Award nomination for his piece of agitprop.
You know: the one that was going to bring down the Bush White House.
Ha, ha, ha, ha [ad infinitum]...
I don't know. Do you think Hollywood has been chastened? Maybe some. It's no good for business to reward sedition and lies if you want to keep the customers happy.
It's Good When the Steelers Lose
As a man who still sees Lynn Swann burning Charlie Waters and Cliff Harris in the end zone when he closes his eyes, I am pleased to see the Pittsburgh Steelers lose to the New England Patriots this evening.
LOSE.
Heh, heh.
But that Roethlisberger kid. You're gonna see him again, I'm afraid to say. A damn solid team there. Better [luck] next time.
Ripped Off
New England just got ripped off on that coach's challenge. There was never any question that their wide receiver had the ball; I thought it was just a matter of whether he was down by contact. Isn't that what the ref said when he went to review? I thought for sure that he was down and that he wasn't entitled to the extra yards he got up and ran for, but the ref is saying that he never even had control of the ball. That's crap. The guy definitely had the ball. What are they talking about? The Patriots were completely rooked on that call. No question.
The First Lady: "Kinda Hot"
Mort Kondracke on Fox News this weekend declared Mrs. Bush to be "kinda hot." Ha, ha. That's great. And, yes, Mortimer, that is correct. She's a lovely lady. I liked her in the white outfit at the Inaugural itself and just as much in the sequined ball gown later on.
A Bittersweet Afternoon Now Playing: a poem read by Jimmy Stewart
I was on my way home a while ago from the Bris Milah for my friend David's son Noah when I called my eldest brother to see what they were up to ---and he told me that Johnny Carson has died. Good Christ! What an odd afternoon. Earlier, I was participating in a Jewish ritual going back, as the mohel reminded us, thirty-seven centuries ---and then I am snapped back to a far more recent and personal flood of memories.
If we are normal Americans, we are all the children of TV. Carson was a voice and a face in my home from the time of my birth until my early 20s. How can recollecting your own childhood not conjure up dozens of memories of time spent laughing along with your family at the jokes and skits and animals and wonders that Carson brought us every night? When it was bedtime on a school night and I was told to get to sleep, I used to be able to secretly and somehow tune my radio to his show while all the grown-ups got to watch it on TV downstairs. What a huge influence that man had for someone you could never really know.
Johnny Carson lived a successful life. I hope he drew as much pleasure as possible from his retirement years. I hope he was not a sad man in his seclusion.
I watched his last show at a friend's house under the influence of something or other and it was a night to remember. Jesus! Has it really been almost 13 years?
I'm thinking right now of Joan Embry bringing animals for Johnny to hang out with. Thinking about Letterman and Seinfeld and Shandling, too. I'm thinking of Carol Wayne's fantastic rack and Ed McMahon trying not to appear too drunk. I'm thinking of Carson's ridiculous jackets ---but, man, what a dresser! He was cool and he could get away with anything.
Rest in Peace, Johnny. And welcome to the Covenant, Noah. This is how I am remembering your special day.
Also Sprach Mitofsky
On Wednesday night's broadcast of Nightline, Ted Koppel entertained the Democratic fringe's conspiracy theories behind their recent electoral losses to the GOP. I'm not sure why this indulgence was necessary, except maybe to keep Koppel's bona fides with the liberal element living amongst us, but he gave it as much of an airing as it should ever deserve again.
One of the main characters in the Left's mythology of the 2004 Elections is Warren Mitofsky, the owner of Mitofsky International, which is a firm contracted by the major media outlets to conduct exit polling. (Edison Media Research was the other major supplier of exit polling data to this consortium.)
In the morning and afternoon of 2 November 2004, the Kerrion and Big Media's anti-Bush forces were eating up Mitofsky's data because it showed that Kerry was doing quite well across the board. But by late afternoon and early evening, it became evident that the polling data was crap. Mitofsky himself admitted this on Nightline, saying that no one's perfect.
And you know what comes next. After the smoke cleared and this country was delivered from a victory for those who hate her, the Democrats began complaining that the election had been stolen. On what grounds did they claim this? In large part, it was because of the exit polling. It was too divergent from the final totals ---meaning, obviously, that Bu$hitler had somehow bought off Diebold and thousands of crooked county elections officials all across the United States and King County, Washington.
Professional dissident (and part-time Congressman) John Conyers certainly saw it that way. In an open letter to Mitofsky and Edison, Conyers writes (emphasis mine):
To be frank, blaming such factors as distant restrictions on polling places, weather conditions, the age of exit poll workers, and the fact that multiple precincts were contained at the same polling place, as your report does, does not come close to explaining why the exit polls overstated support for the Kerry/Edwards ticket in 26 states and support for the Bush/Cheney ticket in only 4 states. Many of the factors you point to appear to merely be random characteristics of the election and your exit polling, rather than quantifiable and justifiable explanations. Nor can I believe that the massive discrepancies can credibly be written off to eagerness of Kerry voters to participate in the exit polls.
As a result, I would like to reiterate my request to receive the actual raw exit poll data that you obtained. I would also like to obtain copies of all internal deliberations, memos and other materials of your employees and consultants concerning or seeking to explain the discrepancies. To the extent you have concerns regarding releasing propriety [sic] information, I am willing to work with you to either receive this information on a confidential basis, or alternatively to bring in a neutral, outside expert to review these materials.
I don't know what jurisdiction Conyers or his committee has in this, but it strikes me as bully-boy bullshit. There's more of a justification for John McCain to take piss samples from Barry Bonds than what this stuff entails.
Here's the bottom line: the American People have spoken. Bush won a majority of the popular vote ---as well as winning the Electoral College. John Kerry's election would have been universally understood as a retreat from our mission to crush international Islamofascism. It would have consigned Iraq to oblivion ---and everyone knows that. Thus, in their wisdom, the American People rejected Kerry's lies and cleverness and chose a man who is committed to our safety and the pursuit of the democratic ideal across the world.
Conyers and the rest of the Democratic craphounds are not willing to admit reality. It's not just creepy ---it verges on sedition. For the second time in four years, the party of John Kennedy and Lyndon Johnson ---two of the most notorious election thieves of the Twentieth Century--- has the temerity to call the election of the President into question ---without justification and without regard for the integrity of our system. It is time to sit down and shut up. To persist with this nonsense about stolen elections is a dangerous way to go.
A [Thousand] Road Apples Mood: d'oh Now Playing: "Get Together" by The Youngbloods
Yesterday, a large group of abortion survivors ---calling themselves peace activists, anarchists, communists, Dean supporters, video camera operators, whatever--- blocked off the Congress Avenue Bridge here in Austin to protest the Second Inauguration of George W. Bush, President of the United States. NBC affiliate KXAN obligingly provided a helicopter's eye view of the whole mess and our ABC station KVUE followed up today with some footage from one of their tower cameras. It literally looked like a truckload of lab rats had spilled out onto Congress Avenue.
The first thing to notice about these proud heirs of Martin Estevez and Tom Hayden is that many of them like to wear bandanas over their faces. Why is this? Do they fancy themselves Zapatistas? Did they have some plan to vandalize something? Why not have some principles, kids? If you're so upset about the exercise of democracy in this country, why not stand up and put your names and faces to your own dissent? I'd hate to think it's because you're a lot of lousy cowards who don't have the stones to do it. Maybe you're just imitating Clinton ---trying to maintain your "political viability." Is that it?
One of these lab rats, a little female named Victoria Cloud (who, unfortunately, did not wear a bandana in her interview), said that this is a "repressive state" and expressed her willingness to do "anything" to make sure her voice was heard. She is also charged with felony assault on a police officer. Ah, yes. How romantic. It's the manufacture of anecdote, see. Little Victoria's earning her street creds ---just like the kid with the Long John Silver's hat on.
Or was that Napoleon's? You know, it may very well have been lined with tinfoil.
All I know is that if I had been on Congress yesterday and those turds had been in my way, I would have gone off on them like a teamster and beat some patriotism into their sorry hippy asses.
No? Then Let Me Turn It up for You Mood: a-ok Now Playing: something from the Knights in Satan's Service
Okay, so it's cute enough that the Bush family's "Hook 'em, Horns!" hand gestures at yesterday's inaugural parade were widely interpreted in Norway as a sign of devil-worship. After all, how would your average godless Norwegian know that we University of Texas Longhorn fans and alumni have been using that gesture for a half-century? But how does the local CBS affiliate here in Austin approach this amusing story?
This afternoon, KEYE reporter Julie Simon goes and interviews "international hand gesture expert" Jurgen Streeck, who helpfully observes that:
"It just confirms stereotypes that people already have and reinforces negative views."
What the hell is that supposed to mean?! What, is this culture and our government perceived around the world as actual Satan-worshippers? What nonsense! Is that a stereotype that "people" have ---or is that just Streeck's own particular view of his host country?
How about if ---just this once--- the fault of ignorance isn't ours? Norwegians don't understand some hand gesture used by sports fans at an American university? Really? I don't understand why Norwegians are [shocked] and [confused] by something thats context is pretty obvious. Let's see: the Bush family wasn't flashing that gesture at any other group of parade participants before or after the marching band from the University of Texas went by ---replete with enormous displays of long horns--- but they chose to do so only then because that would be the perfect opportunity to profess reverence for the Prince of Darkness? Am I to believe this? Are Norwegians actually that imaginationally stunted?
Simon continues:
And since one of the meanings [of that gesture] has to do with the Devil, Streeck says, before flashing any hand gesture, one might want to think about how it could be interpreted half a world away.
What? And forfeit my right to practice my local and tribal customs? Somebody, get me the UN!
Simon also says:
The "Hook 'em, Horns!" sign, for hundreds of thousands of people, is really the ultimate symbol of school pride. But with the ever-increasing negative perception of Americans around the world, many say this misunderstanding is the last thing we needed.
No, Julie, the last thing we needed was for you to take a funny story and make it into this hour's reason to blame America ---and those uncouth Texans, in particular--- for being insensitive to The Other.
Me, I'm just itching to show an Arab the sole of my shoe.
Posted by Toby Petzold
at 8:09 PM CST
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Updated: Friday, 21 January 2005 8:18 PM CST
Thursday, 20 January 2005
Delicious Now Playing: "Venus in Furs" by the Velvet Underground
Laura Bush is one hot babe. Hmmm. Am I allowed to say that?
Chief
I was moved to see Rehnquist come in under his own power. It may very well be the last major act he performs and, as such, was a noble and historical effort.
special
a-ok
d'oh
suave